home again

Spencer and I enjoyed a lovely week away in Oregon. We kept things low key and slow paced… slept in, watched movies, took lots of naps, talked and laughed, enjoyed bird watching from our balcony, took a couple of short walks as my limited strength allowed… It was a quiet, restful, encouraging week – just what we needed after last week's shock at Spencer’s Lyme diagnosis.

The view from our living room and balcony was beautiful. We saw quite a few bald eagles, hawks, ravens, geese, robins, and a few blue jays.

On Thursday, we decided to be particularly adventurous and drove about an hour away to Crater Lake. During the first half of the week, the road to Crater Lake was closed due to ice and snow. We were glad and thankful that the road opened on Thursday and we were able to see it. Stunningly beautiful. How kind and gracious of God to allow us to experience and enjoy His creation!

we both blinked :)

Spencer began antibiotic treatment for Lyme during our time away. So far, he’s tolerated it okay. We’re hoping and praying that he won’t have too severe of a die-off reaction and that the drugs won’t be too hard on his body. His recent diagnosis still feels very surreal to both of us and it's easy to get scared and overwhelmed about the implications of both of us having Lyme. We’re trying to take things day by day right now… God has proven Himself faithful and compassionate over and over and we trust He will continue to care for, guide, and provide for us in the future.

It was a rough week for me physically. A great deal of writhe-around-uncontrollably pain raging all throughout my body, dizzying nausea, and overwhelming fatigue. Thanks to a loving and attentive husband and strong pain medication, I was able to enjoy the week amidst such intense discomfort. Most of the days I was unable to do much besides lie in bed or on the couch, so I loved it when I had enough strength to handle the trip to Crater Lake - so refreshing and totally worth the spoons that were lost. It was wonderful spending an entire week with my beloved with nothing to do other than hang out and relax together. Such a blessing! The change of scenery was also encouraging – I love our home, but after being housebound month after month by this illness, it’s nice to have a change of pace now and then.

All in all, a very restful week amidst difficult times.

Please continue to pray for wisdom for us - we're hoping that treatment won't make Spencer too sick, but we do need to come up with some backup plans in case he is put out of commission and unable to work enough hours or take care of me. We're trying to not worry or borrow tomorrow's troubles, but at the same time, want to be prepared and wise as we consider school for Spencer, finances, etc.

Spencer has Lyme

...we found out this morning.

Spencer and I are both laughing and rather puzzled at how God continues to keep us on our toes. We're not sure what He intends to accomplish through our situation, but we do know that is for our good and we earnestly pray that we would honor and glorify Him through this trial.

For more details, you can read my health blog.

We're doing okay with this news - overwhelmed and surprised and I've cried a few times - but okay. We could really use prayer for wisdom as we face this new reality and the implications involved.

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On a lighter note, we're going to be heading out of town on Saturday. Quite some time ago, we had planned on this - sort of an early two year anniversary getaway and an effort to maintain our sanity amidst incredibly trying times. Little did we know that we would find out about Spencer's Lyme diagnosis just days before - we both think this trip couldn't have come at a better time. Time to rest, pray, absorb this new information, talk, and plan. We'll be staying at a time share that Spencer's parents graciously offered us the use of. It's just a few hours away and we plan on doing very little...just taking it easy. A change of scenery will be really nice. We're looking forward to it. :)

medical update

I just posted an update on my health blog for anyone interested :)

one year

A year ago today, I received my registered nursing license in the mail. I was so happy about it and although sick, I was hopeful that within a few months, I'd be strong enough to begin working as a RN.

I'm feeling pretty bummed that a year later, I am far sicker and have yet to do anything with that hard earned RN license. I love nursing and miss it SO much. I am trying to be thankful for all the wonderful experiences I had caring for patients during nursing school and all that I learned. But I am also heartbroken.

Spencer has been so good about comforting and encouraging me, reminding me that right now, God has something better in mind than me being a super nurse. Perhaps in the future I'll be well enough to work as a RN, but for now, my task is to wait patiently and with a trusting, joyful attitude. Some days this waiting is so tough though!

I'm trying to dwell on some of my favorite passages of scripture to keep my heart in the right place. I'd love to know what passages of scripture have been particularly encouraging to you. Please share!

valentine's day

It was a simple and quiet day. Spent with my beloved.

I honestly cannot understand why God so graciously blessed me with such an excellent husband. Spencer never ceases to amaze me - his love for Christ is so evident in his actions and character - wisdom, compassion, steadfastness, patience, humility, eagerness to serve. He leads me in such a Christlike manner - placing my needs above his own, gently exhorting and challenging me when I need it, always seeking to protect and nurture me. He never complains about all he has to do for me while I'm so sick - and believe me, he has a LOT to do - he joyfully and faithfully goes about caring for me in the gentlest, most attentive way.

He was so thoughtful and surprised me with homemade wheat-free scones for breakfast. Sadly, I was so nauseous and could hardly get anything down. It was still such a sweet gesture and we had a lovely morning cuddling and finishing a movie.

I spent most of the day wilted on the couch. My body has been so unhappy.

Meanwhile, Spencer cheerfully did housework. I am so eager to have the strength and energy to help out with chores again, so that this poor man can actually get some rest on the weekend.

In the late afternoon, Spencer decided to take me out for a drive for a change of scenery. I've been too sick to get out of the house lately, so it was wonderful to enjoy the sky, trees, and sea.

I was exhausted from even a short drive, so when we got home, I crashed in bed while Spencer made dinner. Tri tip, parmesan risotto, and green beans. That man can cook! It all turned out SO good.

All day I was hoping and praying I'd have a bit of an appetite so I could actually enjoy the meal. And I did! It was wonderful to actually enjoy eating, rather than mechanically shoveling food in my mouth and forcing myself to swallow.

All in all, a very sweet day, despite feeling awful. We've both come to terms with how a chronic illness has no regard for holidays or special occasions. You feel just as rotten as any other day. And rather than be sad about how we can't celebrate how we'd like to, we're trying to make the most of it.