this week

Me-oh-my, lots of happenings have been going on around here...
--We have the pleasure and privilege of having Matt, Heather, and Georgie stay with us during the holidays. What a treat it has been :)
--Spencer and I are both officially done with classes for the Fall semester. Whew! We're both sleeping much better now. What a liberating feeling to not be frantically cramming for exams and whatnot...
--I have completed and graduated from nursing school. Praise God!
--This is the last Saturday we will have in Southern California for quite some time. Next week, Lord willing, we'll be unpacking and getting settled in our new home 700 miles away...Please pray for safety and sanity as we make our move on Wednesday, the 26th. I'm still feeling pretty lousy, so it's been difficult preparing to move, especially during the holidays...

Moving is bittersweet for us...
We are SO excited about moving to such a beautiful, laid back place that is drastically different in both climate and population. I'm thankful and glad Spencer can resume his studies in oceanography and chemistry--God has given him the ability to thrive in and enjoy this area of study and we eagerly await to see how He uses him in this area. We are also looking forward to hiking, beaching, and exploring our beautiful surroundings--so much outdoorsy stuff that we can't wait to try out and enjoy. And...clean air...ahhhh.
However, we are also feeling quite bummed about leaving our loved ones. Both sets of parents, siblings, and dear friends from church, school, and small groups. We will really miss Grace Baptist and Grace Community Church--We've both grown up having the privilege of being part of wonderful, biblically sound churches that faithfully teach the Word of God. Up North, it is a dark place, spiritually, and the church as a whole is really struggling. Please pray for wisdom and patience for us as we seek to find the right church to get plugged into.

Thank you for your kind words and encouragement in response to my last rather pitiful post. I appreciate your thoughtfulness and support :)

Discouraged

You know when you play with a yo-yo and it goes up and down a couple of times, but then it loses its spin and just hangs there and won't bounce back up? Well, okay, maybe only I understand this since I seem to lack yo-yo skills :) Anyways, that's how I've been feeling lately. I get a good day or even part of a day, and then a tough one. And then another good one. And then I'm down for days and days and am hardly functional. This is where I'm at right now.

I've been working so hard at being thankful and having a good attitude despite feeling so yucky and it has helped me emotionally and spiritually. But this body still feels quite bad. I've gotten pretty good at toughing it out and covering up how bad I really feel when I'm around friends and family, but am realizing that maybe I shouldn't work so hard to cover it up. It's not an attempt driven by vanity, but more of an attempt to not be the center of attention or be a burden/storm cloud to those I love and care about. Ugh, I don't like to complain, especially on a blog like this, but I need to be honest and let folks know what's going on with me. I hate being "needy," but am realizing that God has placed me in a situation that makes me needy--we're all in this state at one point or another and right now, it's my turn--it's taken me a while to realize and accept this. I could really use some prayer and encouragement over the next couple of weeks. Thank you to those of you who have already been praying and reaching out to me and Spencer. It means SO much to me. Spencer and I are both so blessed by your kind words and generous actions...

Please pray for us as we seek a wise route to take regarding my health. Please also pray that I would be patient and learn to rest in God's perfect will during this struggle. I'd just really like to have some energy and be well :)

Boys will be boys...

Spencer and Dad were out working in the back yard this weekend. They were on opposite sides of the yard and simultaneously, each fellow found himself a lizard. They were very eager to show me and Mom their critters...It's a tad blurry, but I just love their faces (if you click on the pic you can get a little better look at the lizards...)



A closer look...

It's going to take a while

for this to sink in.
The final was hard--made me feel a bit like an idiot who shouldn't be let out of nursing school (my classmates felt the same way, which was reassuring). But it's over. I got an A on the final--didn't feel very confident while taking it, so all I can base my success on is that God, in His infinite mercy and grace, gave me the strength and ability to focus on my exam and recall the things I needed to in order to do well. This semester has been so hard for me--it's been the most fun and easy going school-wise, but still the most difficult because of my health struggles. It has certainly allowed me to see God's provision in my life in a very tangible way.
As of tonight, I am officially DONE. No more lectures, HW, exams, or clinicals. Yay :)

a few scattered conclusions

Apparently I'm entering a new stage of umm, emotional development? I used to rarely cry. Never out of happiness, and not even that often out of sadness unless I was really upset. And during a movie? Nope. Sure, I had strong feelings, but they weren't manifested by tears. The start of nursing school increased the frequency of tearful situations, but I was still pretty stable.
Well, getting married triggered something because now I can't seem to stop crying! I cry at weddings out of happiness, sob during movies, and weep hysterically over not freezing leftover turkey in time. Poor Spencer.

This blog is not very interesting. Seems to me that blogs are much more interesting when you've got kids to write about and post pictures of. The best we can do right now is tell cute stories about our houseplant (that we accidentally killed), as that's the closest thing to kids that we've got. Seeing as we can't manage to keep a plant alive, perhaps it's a good thing we don't have children to blog about. :)

I will be done with nursing school in *gulp* 3 days. It feels unreal. A final on Thursday and clinical on Friday. Wow.
What do I do now? No more school? Getting a job sounds exciting, but it's also intimidating. Being an expert worrier, I begin to fret about nobody wanting to hire me... I've started the job hunt/application process, but can't interview until we make the move up north so am kind of in limbo right now.

Spencer is such an immense blessing to me. I love him so. We're coming up on the 6 month mark of our marriage. These 6 months have been wonderful and I feel so privileged to have shared them with this exceptional man. God has been so good to us :)

Haha, I stumbled upon this pic today...it was taken almost 3 years ago exactly when we went to Knott's Berry Farm with Lindsay and Sean. They didn't want to get wet, so Spencer and I went on the water ride (is it Thunder Rapids or Bigfoot Rapids??) by ourselves--we were "just friends" at this point. I'm glad things changed :)

another attempt

I have intentions to make a post, but lack the energy to come up with much to say. I usually begin to write a few sentences about such and such, get worn out, and go lie down or try to get back to studying. Haha, I should be studying right now. It's late and I've got a test tomorrow morning. But my brain is tired and can only absorb so much information. I need a bit of a break.

Some things that I am currently quite the fan of...

♥Throat Coat Tea. SO comforting and soothing. If you have a serious aversion to licorice, I'd avoid it. I, however, think this stuff is superb.
♥Instant Rice Noodle Soup from Trader Joe's. Gluten, corn, soy, and dairy free. Way yummier than "Cup-o-noodles" or Ramen. My appetite has been pretty pathetic lately, but these have been quite palatable to me.
♥Jojoba oil. Makes a real nice moisturizer in this dry climate and it isn't gross smelling or greasy. Another find at Trader Joe's, of course. Man oh man, I'm going to miss that place when we move!
♥the realization that I've only got 9 more days of nursing school (!!!!)
♥ The Neti Pot. Not for the faint of heart. But if you're an allergy sufferer and are plagued with sinus troubles, it might be a good thing. I'm still getting the hang of it, but I've noticed an improvement. It's nice to be able to smell things :)

Alright, I need to get back to cramming about burns and endocrine problems... Thanks for reading :)

a praise

Spencer and I have been looking for an apartment up north and just weren't finding much. We had hoped to rent from Spencer's previous landlord, as we liked the location, the price, and knew it would be an overall good situation. Sadly, she had nothing available for when we'd need it. We could only find a few other places that might work and it was looking like we'd have to make a trip up there this week to interview and secure a place. Spencer reminded me that God would provide us with what we need, and then jokingly added that even if we ended up living "in a van, down by the river," that we would be just fine. Being a professional fretter and worry wart, I did not feel at ease about this situation and began to create horrible scenarios in my head where we really did have to live in our car! We wouldn't even have the luxury of a van, just a car! And we'd more likely be under a freeway overpass than by a river. Silly me.

Anyways, Spencer's previous landlady gave us a call last week out of the blue. She wanted to alert us to an apartment that would end up opening just when we'd need it. They're not requiring us to drive up to see the place, since Spencer has seen it already because he worked as a maintenance handyman for them. We're able to do all the paperwork through the mail and the place is reserved for us. Wow! Why do I fret so much? God proves me wrong over and over, yet I still have this compulsion to worry about "what if's." He is too good to a worrier like me :)

23

Almost 2 years ago exactly, I got a voicemail from the dean of nursing congratulating me on getting into the nursing program.

And now, I've got 23 days left. Woah, how did those 2 years go by so quickly? ...by the grace of God.
In these 23 days I've got 3 exams to take (*edit--took 1 of them this morning--only 2 more!), 2 projects to complete, NCLEX paperwork to fill out and submit, and *gasp* only 3 more clinical days. With the way I've been feeling, school has become pretty overwhelming. But reminding myself that I only have to push through 23 more days helps a bit.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Morale Booster ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So. In the past month and a half, I've really been missing foods. I've indulged in a piece of apple pie (majorly regretted it) and a hamburger, but other than that, life has been gluten, dairy, egg, and sugar free. At times my restrictions have been even more limited (no meat, nuts, soy, corn, etc), but in the past week I've been allowed a bit more variety.

Anyways. Tonight I had a quesadilla. And a chocolate chip cookie. Oh my goodness.
The above food items were delicious (Spencer tried them to be sure I that I wasn't at the point of desperation where ANYthing tastes good--he agreed that they were yummy). AND, they were gluten, egg, and dairy free. The cookie had a bit of cane sugar & juice in it--but at this point, I'm not gonna stress over it since it's a very minimal part of my diet.
I know, this probably sounds silly. But as Heather well knows, it is HARD finding food items that are free of gluten, dairy, egg, and refined sugar.
It was just so nice to be able to eat something crunchy and "cheesy." The end :)

I love that guy

As I type, Spencer is in the kitchen making dinner for us and doing the dishes. Oh, and there's a load of laundry going that he just started. What a guy. And what a blessing he is! He doesn't seem to tire of giving and is so patient and kind with his sickly (and often cross) wife. He is such an encouragement to me.

Today has been pretty rough physically. Rather discouraging, but I'm thankful for being allowed a couple of sunny days earlier this week--makes the dreary days more bearable :)
How wonderful to rest in the fact that God knows what I need and is faithful to never give me more than I can bear--He is so good.
...now if only I'd rest in this wonderful fact at ALL times, rather than worry and fret so needlessly! Silly me...

a breath of fresh air

This past week has been so difficult for me. Very uncomfortable and painful.

But yesterday, I woke up feeling rested. Still weak and ill, but not AS yucky feeling. I even felt well enough to venture out to church with Spencer last night, which was so encouraging. And today, I'm feeling about the same. Am I ever thankful and glad for the slightest increase in energy! Thanks be to God for sustaining and strengthening me!

Unexpected Visitors

So Dad gave me a call on Wednesday around 2. "Hey, Mike and I are in the area and were wondering if we could stop by to say hi." Oh yay, visitors. Spencer was out doing an errand for me because I was feeling so bad and I was kind of lonely. "Sure! Come on over."

About 10 minutes later, I hear frantic foreign voices (Italian, German? I really can't say...) coming up my driveway. A bunch of random thuds/knocks on the door and more yelling.

These guys offered to paint the house, but charged an outrageous amount--Mike was yelling something about $1400 just to paint the doorbell, so I passed on their offer. They made good company though :)